Day to Day #D/s

By | December 2, 2013

As I am writing this I am sitting at the airport, little flower just dropped me off for my fight back home.

Yesterday afternoon while we had some time I booked my flight to come back for Christmas. It is less then 3 weeks away and I will be staying for two full weeks.

This time was a bit different then our other visits, with the Thanksgiving holiday I met her family which went fairly well as I have been invited back for Christmas. The other aspect was that we both worked while I was there.

No not my normal job just I do freelance work and I had a job to do; little flower herself had to work several days leading up to Thanksgiving so this time more then others we were more so like a couple then any other of our visits. While the work I did was from my laptop at her home, each morning she left for work while I stayed home and did my thing.

Over the course of my visit did we play? Of course we did, we did manage to relive some of the holiday stress.

This visit was more then that though, while there I did mundane vanilla things. Her vacuum cleaner had been broken and I fixed that for her. One night I cooked dinner for us, a simple dinner to be sure (Italian sausage w/ peppers and onions and grilled red potatoes) but it came out rather tasty.

I took care of washing the dishes, granted put them in the dishwasher but made sure they were done all the same. This past weekend we also decorated for Christmas, put up the tree, hung the lights and decorations. Drank hot chocolate and ate sugar cookies with the boys while watching Christmas shows.

While we have known for some time that our kinks and D/s style fit very well together this showed a totally different aspect of that dynamic. Through it all we meshed quite well on the day to day, on the vanilla aspect of life. Which is important.

I like to cook so for me it was enjoyable to put together a meal for the two of us. We talked about domestic duties a while back, I am terrible at cleaning bathrooms but can clean a kitchen any day in a heartbeat. She dislikes likes cleaning the kitchen but can whip out a bathroom in not time flat.

(note to self, a fitting punishment would be to make her clean the kitchen!)

While D/s and BDSM is a major part of our lives and who we both are there are still the day to day routines that need to be navigated. We did well, very well as a matter of fact.
We seem to mesh in many ways that compliment one another.

Even in my freelance job she was able to help me over a hurdle. I had been working most of the afternoon on the job and hit a major wall. What should have been a simple process had now turned into a white elephant in the room. I had tried to work through it but ran into another wall.
When she got home after work she saw my frustration and asked what had happened. I explained to her what had been going on.
Later that night she sat down with me and did some searching online and found another suitable option which then allowed me to move forward with the project and I was able to complete it and get paid.

So yes, even outside the D/s we have woven into our lives we seem to function well.

This morning when the alarm clock rang I was awake immediately, little flower hit the snooze button and began to roll back over; she never made it. I pulled her to me and I took her with a savage vengeance. I wanted to leave no doubt in her mind who she belonged to. In the end she has no doubt of it, I left her sore, wrung every orgasm I could out of her, and she will have several bites that should bruise quite nicely over the next day or two.

I also come away from this trip having learned more about myself and our D/s aspect of our relationship. With the hectic pace of the holiday I didn’t keep quite a tight enough rein on some things which in turn allowed her to act out in certain ways. It showed me even though the vanilla rituals of the holidays can be faced paced and things can be out of routine it is then that I need to be even more vigilant in making sure things stay as much on track as possible.

It is a learning and growing process for us both, so far we are making the journey and expanding each others boundaries.

Is it Christmas yet?



13 thoughts on “Day to Day #D/s

  1. Franco Bolli

    Beneath the D/s dynamics we are all normal couples with the obvious daily/weekly stuff to do. Personally I do not believe in or want a 24/7 D/s relation. Princess and I also savor the vanilla stuff as it is a part of our life. BDSM is just the superb icing of the cake.

    1. southerns Post author

      You are correct it is the icing on the cake and yet the D/s seems to add to the day to day.

  2. Mynx

    Building the foundation of a new relationship, can be exciting, but add to that relationship the Elements of D/s, or in your case Daddy/little, and you now have something explosive. So happy for you and little flower Sir, I know absence makes the heart grow fonder, but time spent together builds a relationship.

    Two weeks together for the holidays is fantastic, and I know you are counting days and hours!

    1. southerns Post author

      Our time together is wonderful and each time we seem to reach a new level in our relationship. The distance can be frustrating at times yet we have managed to traverse the waters, each day the 20th gets closer.

  3. Mynx's Sir

    You Sir, are a man above men- really!

    Let me explain- to be clear, it’s difficult enough to date, get to know, fall in love, appreciate her, -then- date, get to know, and be loved by the children, -then- be introduced to their family and be accepted by them — when you live the same area code! LOL! You two have had major hurdles above and beyond that to overcome- and have survived them even after the ‘new car smell’ has worn off. Major kudos to you both for even accepting these challenges, and further excelling beyond them. You’re just so damn cute together, LOL! The power of prose for you both is on your side as well- I enjoy your chronicles about life magnified by the jet ride apart.

    One nugget of advice as you look forward to your two week stay- there’s another bug called ‘Day-2-Day-itis’ (D2D-itis) that loves to knife its way between two who care about each other. Its kryptonite is being able to keep it lite and laugh at yourself and each other when mistakes are made. Its other arch rival is forgiveness- allowing yourselves to love each other unconditionally. And to round out the trifecta, the other evil villain is truly listening to what the other is ‘not’ saying as much as what they ‘are’ saying; men have a propensity to want to ‘fix it’ no matter what it is, women typically need to ‘just vent’ and blow off steam. Keep it real, live, laugh, love, listen, and most importantly- lust for one-another. If one of those goes MIA, call a ‘time out’ and ask for a ‘replay’ of the event, then and only then figure out if discipline is required, I think it usually is- LOL! Generally speaking, all is forgiven when ‘understanding’ rules the day. What you do at night is just more fun when you do.

    So it looks like that’s more than one nugget of information, and I (we) hope you’ll both find these helpful.

    I look forward to the chronicles of life between you two, too. Both of your blogs are excellent reads, thank you for sharing your lives with us all- good lessons learned by all who take the time to appreciate your wisdom.

    -Tom Wolf

    1. Mynx

      I think my Sir wrote a post in your comments section Sir! Lol! He gives great advice, but I think he needs to copy and paste to a post on my blog. Hehe!

      We really do wish the best for you and Little Flower!

      1. southerns Post author

        I do appreciate his advice, the more to add to the arsenal of defense in keeping ones relationship alive and vibrant is important.

        It certainly would make a good blog post 🙂

    2. southerns Post author

      These truly are good words of advice and I thank you for them. While we have managed to overcome a number of hurdles life always finds a way to throw a few more into the mix.

      Being able to laugh both at life and at the absurdity of some moments is and has been a life saver for us both. While we both have been able to handle the distance between visits very well there are times it can be rough. The old adage laughter is the best medicine stands true.

      Day-2-Day-itis is something we have talked about extensively in our conversations. I know that even though in TTWD can help alleviate it to some extent that this lifestyle is not exempt from it either.

      Your mention of “in case of emergency” call for a time out and rewind is good mention. That is something that thankfully we have not had to traverse yet but a good one to add to the arsenal of defense.

      One reason I have been so diligent about in maintaining our relationship is that I see her for what she is, a rare gem. Not often a chance comes along that you meet someone that is special and the connection meshes on many levels.

      She asked me once why I do it, my answer to her was simple.
      “Because you’re worth it.”

  4. Cheeky Minx

    This was so beautiful to read. In many ways, the everyday and its banalities can be the best kind of counterpoint for our erotic connections and cravings because it creates a different kind of intimacy. (Granted it can also be, if allowed, the worst).

    I hope the days rush by for you so the two of you can be together once again…

    1. southerns Post author

      I grant you the every day happenings can be a double edged sword. It can be hard to remain vigilant against the down side of them but they do add a certain balance to everything.

      The days are and will fly by, plan tickets are already purchased and ready to go.

  5. Kayla Lords

    I am one of the luckiest women alive (Mynx may disagree, lol). I worry so much about Day-2-Day-itis and that this can’t possibly last, and how can it feel so natural after what feels like such a short time? So I worry a lot – but you already knew that.

    This isn’t the burning of a fiery blaze of passion that can be snuffed out like a candle. It’s the warm glow of candlelight (no less hot, though). I’ve never had warm glow…only blazes that were snuffed out for a myriad of reasons.

    I like that we laugh together, cook together, clean together, sit still and say nothing together. I like that we need space from one another every so often, because as introverts we just need space in general. I like that we don’t embarrass easily (ok, that YOU don’t embarrass easily). I like that it’s normal and kinky, exciting and mundane. I just like it all…

    Oh, and for the record, he makes a mean sausage and peppers dinner. Just sayin’…

  6. Mynx

    Kayla, I think we are both the luckiest women alive! Lol! I found my soulmate and Sir twenty years ago, and he still to this day rocks my world. A great relationship is work, but a true labor of love.

    Don’t worry about the day to day itis, if you and Your Daddy are meant to be you will be! Relax, and enjoy the ride. If it feels right, it is right. Just let it be what it will be. I have a good vibe about you two. Best wishes to both of you, and Sir and I look forward to following your journey together. Hugs to both of you!


  7. Mynx's Sir

    Ha! Is that an ‘angry sausage’ sandwich? Maybe there’s a new game for adults as a spin-off to angry birds? LOL, all in fun- you two will be fine! As I say to Mynx all the time- “relax.”


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