Soft Touch

By | May 1, 2013

Do a search on the Internet for BDSM, Dominance, submission, bondage, etc and you will turn up a plethora of images of a scowling Dom and a submissive being tortured in the most cruelest of ways.

Rope work ties so tight it makes you wonder how they can stand it even for a few moments.Even some of the stories that you come across are the deepest darkest fantasies imaginable, the ones that lay in the most hidden corners of the mind.

This is all well and good; it has “entertainment” value.

There are times as a Dom when you know you must push and push hard.
When there is nothing but that stern voice and sharp command is needed;
that moment when you must snap to and demand immediate attention.

Then there is the time that a soft push is needed, one that is almost imperceptible.
A feathers touch, so light it is not even noticed till some time afterwards.

Theodore Roosevelt said it best; “Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far.”

There are times to be the Alpha male, bold, daring, outspoken, and commanding.
Then there are times when the soft tones and quiet nudges are what are needed.

Some might say that isn’t Dom like, you have to be tough, stand firm, growl.
That is even more Dom like if you ask me.
Knowing your s so well that you know then they need that firm hard edge and knowing when they need that nudge but in a subtle way.

If a sub has been hurt depending on them of course, the last thing they need is an Alpha male bearing down on them. A soft Dom, leading them gently..still leading, but in a different way may well be what they need.

Could that be considered coddling? No, not at all; coddling someone would be allowing them to wallow where they are, enabling them to continue the kind of behavior they are exhibiting.
But to softly lead them out, to get them to a stronger point where then you can once again be firm, that is not coddling.

A sub is supposed to be perceptive to the needs of their Dom, so should a Dom be perceptive to the needs of their sub and under the circumstances which is the best way to proceed.