Play it safe

By | February 5, 2013

I was talking to a friend the other day and the topic of “safe words” came up and I was asked if I use one

The answer is a resounding YES!

Safe, Sane, and Consensual…always!

Having a safe word in place is important.
Never and I mean never play without having a safe word in place.
If a Dom were to ask you to play and didn’t want a safe word, walk away!
Trust plays a big factor in using a safe word, if a Dom continues even after a safe word is invoked that could lead to serious trouble.
Always know who you are playing with and that you trust and respect them to do the same for you.

The same goes with drinking or even drugs. A big no no when engaging in any kind of scene.
Being under the influence impedes judgment and that can lead to some serious consequences.
When in any kind of scene one must be sharp and on alert for any sign of trouble.
The Dom is in control during a scene and has to be aware of what is going on.
If anything is out of the norm he must be able to pick upon that.

The same goes if either one is sick or not feeling well.
Pain that is usually pleasurable can be picked up by the body in different ways if one is sick.
Just like with your knee it is important to know about things like that before playing.
If something that is not known before hand there is the possibility of further injury .

Before hand always talk about your expectations of what will be occurring.
While not always the minutest details may be talked about, some surprise is good.
Knowing what is in store can help alleviate anxiety and fear.
As a couple plays together more and more and they know each other then it may not be as important but is still good to do.

Always play it safe.

14 thoughts on “Play it safe

  1. JK

    Good advice, SS. Even though Sofia and I have been playing hard for two years, we still have a safe word, just in case. I’m always pushing it, and it’s common for her to fight against me, using NO and STOP all the time. There must be another word she can use that truly means stop. It’s essential.

    1. SouthernSir

      JK that is a perfect example sometimes in the play “no” and “stop” as well as “don’t” can’t be relied on. It is always good to have something in place. Thanks for commenting.

  2. southernbarbiedoll

    I know when I had did a project for class and when I did a few research. I did notice a few guys said they did not use safewords since they can tell by the woman’s body. But what is sort of crazy is not every woman is the same. Some react differently. Like some may shut their eyes tightly if their in pain, bite bottom lip and some do things that not every body knows about. I was just curious how they could tell, maybe if their with the girl for years I guess you can tell….but that was one thing I didnt fully get.

    1. SouthernSir

      While being with someone for a long period of time you do recognize body language more so then most but there may still be circumstances that come into play that it is still important to have a safe word in place.

  3. Wordwytch

    Thank you for this post Southern Sir. I don’t care how well you know your Dom or sub, there are always moments when things go wrong and that Safe word may be the only thing that works. Plus, sometimes we yell no, when we mean yes and all those mix ups.

    Safe, sane and Consensual. It’s the only way to go.

      1. Wordwytch

        Always. Hell, even in regular Vanilla sex you can get carried away. πŸ™‚

        (oh… wait… is that when it becomes kink?) πŸ™‚

  4. Ms. B

    This is where you’ve gone. I checked on your blogger a few times and didn’t see anything new! Loved reading along…

    1. SouthernSir

      Ms. B, yes I moved I do need to update the old blog that I have the new one here and I intend to move osme of my old writing here as well. Thank you for coming by my new digs. πŸ™‚


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